Leaving Your Baby for the First Time? Here are Five Tips for Dealing with Separation Anxiety

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The first time you leave your child with a nanny or babysitter can be incredibly stressful. But, don’t let your anxiety or feelings of guilt keep you chained to the house.

It’s important for you to take time away, not just for your wellbeing, but for your baby’s development. By leaving them alone, you’re increasing your baby’s likelihood of growing up to be an independent, well-adjusted child.

Keep these tips in mind to help you keep separation anxiety at bay and feel more confident leaving your child with a sitter.

1. Find a Sitter You Trust

One of the best things you can do to ease your separation anxiety is to take the time to find a sitter that you trust. If you don’t have any family around who can help out, make sure you keep these tips in mind when looking for someone to watch your child:

  • Ask for recommendations from friends or family

  • Work from websites like Care.com that let you look for sitters with specific experience levels

  • Look for someone who has CPR training and/or first aid certifications

2. Set Clear Rules

Once you’ve found a trustworthy sitter, lay out clear rules for them before you go.

Let them know about any rules you have regarding things like television use, meal times, snacks they can serve, and naptime.

Be sure to also give the sitter plenty of details about your baby’s favorite toys and the best ways to comfort him or her should they get fussy. Show them where all the supplies (clothes, milk, bottles, diapers, etc.) are located, too.

3. Have a Clearly Defined Plan for Emergencies

It can also give you peace of mind to know that you’ve laid out a clear emergency procedure for your babysitter.

Leave a list of emergency contact numbers for your sitter. Include numbers for grandparents, doctor, or trusted friends.

If your child has any kind of allergies or other medical conditions, make sure the sitter knows about them beforehand. If you have any kind of medical alert or security system in place, be sure to show them how to use it — you may also want to leave written instructions next to the system, too.

4. Start Slow

To make the first time you leave your child alone a little less nerve-wracking, consider having your sitter come over for a few trial runs before the big day.

Let them spend some time with your baby while you go in the other room. This will help both the sitter and your baby get used to each other, and you’ll be more confident knowing that the sitter already has an idea of your baby’s needs, likes, and dislikes.

5. Make the Transfer as Smooth as Possible

When the time comes to leave your baby, do your best to make the transition as easy as possible.

It might be tempting to sneak out while your baby is napping. But, it’s easy for this kind of exit can backfire. Your baby might feel abandoned and will be confused when they wake up and are greeted by a stranger instead of their mom.

Instead, leave when your baby is in a neutral place. Have them start playing on the floor with the sitter or seat them in their swing. Then, say a quick, cheerful goodbye and make sure they see you leave.

If you do hear your child cry as you’re closing the door or walking to your car, resist the urge to go in and comfort them.

Instead, have the sitter pick your baby up, too, as soon as you’re out the door. This will help the two of them bond and will allow your baby to develop a sense of trust in their new caregiver.

It’s normal to feel nervous about leaving your child with a sitter for the first time. But, it’s important for you to take time for yourself and give your baby a chance to bond with others.

Keep these tips in mind as you prepare to leave your baby with a sitter to help eliminate as much separation anxiety as possible.

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Comments

  1. Excellent tips Courtney,
    Each tip resonates 🙂 I especially like the one of making the transition as smooth as possible
    Sharing it on Pinterest 🙂

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