Moving is stressful, as anyone who has ever done it can tell you. It’s even more stressful when you’re uprooting your kids and moving them as well. When you’re moving as a family, you have more than yourself to think of. You also have to cope with the feelings your children might have about the big move.
It’s important to note that you’re taking them away from their friends, family, schools, and everything they’ve known, especially if they’ve been living in the same place all their lives. That’s why you have to be patient with the emotions that your children may go through at the news that they’re moving and not expect them to be happy and go with the flow.
For example, things like transferring from a public school to a charter school in your new home can be hard on kids, and these feelings need to be considered and addressed, as do things about your new home and new town. In this article, you’ll find a few tips on how to talk to your kids about moving and prepare them for the move ahead.
Break the news early.
It’s never a good idea to tell your children at the last minute that you’re moving to another location. While it may be tempting to avoid the hassle and tell them when you start packing, you’re just asking for trouble that you don’t want to have to deal with. Instead, put yourself in your child’s shoes. Wouldn’t you want to be told way in advance about a move that’s going to change your life? Once you’ve told your child you’re moving, sit down, and rationally explain the reasons why. This is the best way to avoid tears, tantrums, and more tears.
For example, if you’re moving from North Carolina to Oregon, the shock of moving to such a drastically different area is already going to be hard enough. Your children need time to prepare for switching from a public school environment to one of the Oregon charter schools, so telling them early is your best bet. Remember, a charter school is completely different from a brick and mortar school, or any other public school, so take the time to acquaint your child with the idea before the move.
Stress that the decision is final.
The best way to convince your kids that a move is the best thing for them and your family is by stressing that your decision is final and sticking to that decision. You can’t expect your kids to be confident about a move to another town or state unless you’re confident as well.
Make your house a home together.
If you take trips to the house before you move, be sure to take your children with you. Even if it’s to check that the roofing company put your attic insulation in the right way, it’s important to include your kids in the process. You can even make it a teaching moment by explaining what insulation is and why it’s so important to have it in the attic before you move in and those bitter winter snows start to fall. Take your children on a tour of their soon-to-be new home, and explain what each room will be used for.
For example, if you’re putting extra insulation in the attic to turn it into a room for one of the kids, let that kid pick out their own decor, furniture, and the like for their room. Let your child choose whether he wants a king-size bed and mattress in his room or would like a futon and futon mattress instead. Allowing your child to choose the mattress he wants, even if it’s a memory foam futon and a mattress topper or a sleeper sofa instead, will let him know that he has a say in his new home and his new room.
You could also let your child choose whether he would rather make his room in the attic or another room in the house instead, and turn the attic into a game room for all the kids to use together after they get out of their online school every day and on weekends.
Give them time to say goodbye.
It’s a pretty safe bet that you have friends and family you’re leaving behind to make this move, so you should understand that your children do too. It would be best if you gave them the time to say goodbye to friends at their public school and the friends in their neighborhood. For example, the weekend before moving day, let the kids have a sleepover at your house if that’s not beyond your comfort level during the move. You can put mattresses on the floor or even pull out the futon and put it in the attic room of your current home. The point is to let your kids say goodbye to their old life before moving them to their new life, in a new town, in a new home.
These are just a few of the best ways to talk to your kids about moving to a new location and to prepare them for that move as well. Remember, moving is hard on everyone, so do everything you can to make it easier on your family.
I’m a 20-something stay-at-home mother and wife. I have an amazing husband, a beautiful daughter, two loving dogs, and a lazy cat. I wouldn’t change my life for anything! I love to read, listen to music, cook and blog!
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