How To Help A Partner With Low Self-Esteem

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Low Self-Esteem

Low self-esteem is defined as holding oneself in low regard. It’s also seeing oneself, the world, and the future negatively and critically. There are some tell-tale signs that characterize low self-esteem, such as physical insecurities, difficulty in accepting compliments, the need for validation, lack of initiative to try new things, and often feeling worthless.

Being in a relationship with a person with low self-esteem can be tough and challenging to deal with. However, if you value your partner so much, then providing comfort and support wouldn’t be harder as it seems.

It may be difficult to relate with a person who has low self-esteem, however, there are viable ways of helping and aiding them, including online counselling in Canada. Read on to learn more.

Be Independent

Understand that for your partner to improve their self-esteem, they have to take full responsibility and that you cannot do it for them. Your partner has to give more time to do things that make them happy. Expecting to gain that happiness externally means that it will last as long as the external source exists. Obtaining independent self-esteem will hold firm and won’t be compromised by any pressure. 

Bear With Your Partner’s Emotions

As hard as it may be to understand why your partner undermines themselves, it will do more harm than good to try and talk them out of whatever their feelings are. Instead, accept them and try to get along with them. In the process, you’ll become more patient with them, and you’ll be in a better position to encourage them to empower and pick themselves up.

Make Time To Be Actively Together With Your Partner

Being actively together with your partner means opting to interact with one another deliberately. This kind of interaction doesn’t just happen, it requires effort to be intentional. You can take time to talk and just catch up on the day’s events. Spending time over a meal is another way of actively interacting.

Compliment Your Partner

Compliments work well in scenarios where your partner is dismissive about how they look or feel like they are not good enough. Give them sincere compliments as much as you can, especially those that will address whatever insecurities that they may have. Sometimes the compliments may not be taken kindly, but still, give them anyway. Take advantage of things you like in your partner and tell them. Let them know of any achievements they have made, however small they may be, which will significantly impact how they view themselves.

Examine The Past With Your Partner

One of the reasons that could trigger your partner’s low self-esteem is thinking about something that happened to them in the past. Encourage them to share whatever the experience is without pressuring them. Whenever they are ready to talk about what happened back then, listen to them, this way, they will be able to heal.

Be Patient With Your Partner

Dealing with low self-esteem is difficult. You can only help your partner sort out the insecurities that make them feel inadequate by being patient with them. It’s inevitable that there will come a time that you will be angry at your partner because they can’t seem to appreciate your help. As much as you think they may be unfair to you, they are still hurting because of the negative feelings they have about themselves. Remember that you don’t have a way of fixing their issues, but you can help them address their insecurities by encouraging them to think and be positive.

Don’t Be Too Careful

Most of the time, people tend to be too careful not to hurt their partners. The truth is that being too careful could make things worse for your partner. For instance, you could be avoiding specific conversations because they could go south depending on how your partner interprets them. Instead, have that conversation and let your partner share with you what they understood of it. Then, help them understand the actual reason for the conversation. As tough as they may be, having conversations improves communication with your partner. That way, you help your partner see things from a different perspective.


Helping a partner with low self-esteem begins with understanding what they’re going through and where they are coming from. Self-esteem goes beyond just feeling good about oneself and being confident, but the ability to have a sense of self-worth and self-respect. Being supportive of your partner with their low self-esteem struggle shows how much you care about them. Hopefully, the tips mentioned above can help you in developing the right approach to encourage your partner to rebuild themselves in a different light.

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