Going through a divorce in Oklahoma is stressful and depressing for a couple with a family. This difficult moment affects their children, and with their young minds, they may undergo various adverse psychological effects, including anxiety, confusion, rage, and abandonment. The parents also need to decide and follow child custody processes, adding a burden to the family. Fortunately, they can seek the help of Oklahoma divorce and child custody attorney to guide them in resolving child custody concerns while also dealing with divorce issues. In this manner, divorced parents can focus on supporting their children to cope with the divorce and live a normal life.
The impact of divorce on children
The problems that divorce brings are a burden to the children as much as it is to parents. The way a child deals with divorce is determined by their age, personality, and capacity to comprehend the circumstance. Sometimes, children with older age can cope up better than the young ones. For instance, younger children might deal with the problem by sleeping and throwing tantrums, while older or school-age children may develop symptoms of depression and become rebels. With that said, parents must take an active role in alleviating their children’s suffering to overcome the challenging phase in their lives.
Ways of helping your child cope with divorce
Your child’s emotions will go through stages and changes during divorce, and how you address them will ultimately affect their well-being. Here’s how you can help your child through a divorce.
Plan how to tell your child
Pick the right place and time to talk with your child. It would help if you do it in a quiet place, and as much as possible, you and your ex-partner should be present at this time. You should also consider your approach in telling your child by considering their age and their maturity in handling the situation. Young children might need less information, but older ones surely have more questions to ask.
Tell the truth
One of the most crucial things you should tell your child about the divorce is the truth. It will be painful for all parties, but it is better than keeping them in the dark. Your child has a right to know what is going on in the family, and concealing the truth from them will only confuse them. Tell the truth in a way they can easily understand and assure them that your love for them won’t change even though you and your partner have separated.
Ensure that your child feel loved
This is a vulnerable time for your child, so ensure that you don’t let them feel that they’ve been abandoned. It is the child’s right to have communication with both of their parents. So, if there’s no violence involved and you’re confident that your child is safe in speaking with the non-custodial parent, let them talk and experience each other’s presence. Both parents should make their children feel that they would want to be with them regardless of what happened to their family. When your ex-partner fails to show up, let your child know that sometimes, adults make mistakes and hurt the people they love. Although being absent is terrible, it does not imply that you love them less.
Tell your child that the separation is not their fault
When children learn that their parents have divorced, they may blame themselves for not behaving appropriately or being a burden to their parents. So, explain that the divorce is their parents’ fault, and they have nothing to do with it.
Let your child grieve
Your child may suppress their emotions which could trigger stress and other problems on their mental health. As a parent, you should encourage your child to express what they feel about the situation and actively listen to them. Don’t dismiss their feelings by telling them they can move on from it quickly. Instead, tell them that whatever they say and feel is fine and it is normal to grieve. This shows that you understand them and encourages them to be honest with you.
Conclusion
You and your child should be each other’s companions in this challenging time. The most important thing you can do to help your child cope with divorce is to communicate with them. Be honest and tell them everything about what happened and what to expect next. That way, you’ll have a strong support system and be able to move forward peacefully.
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